Thursday, May 21, 2009

That’s A Rap?

You may have noticed a lot of DBA's trying to go around rapping this week. For example, Steve Jones posted DBA's Delight earlier this week with no explanation (braver than me). If I am going to make the world read my sad attempt at writing a rap, I figure I at least owe them an explanation. So here's the scoop. Michelle Ufford and Ward Pond started a SQL Rap Contest the prize is an iPod touch.


Now that you know the motivation behind what you are about to read. Here is my submission...


WARNING! You may notice a yellow tint on your monitor due to the amount of cheese contained in the following post.


Vanilla Ice Parody


All right, DROP the Database and Listen
The Cube is back with a whole new Dimension


Caffeine has a hold on me tightly
I'm gettin paged now daily and nightly


Will it ever stop, yo I don't know
I work all night, its no joke


To the extreme I kill your process like a vandal
Cause I got SQL Skills, (oops that's Paul Randal)


If there is a problem, yo I'll solve it
Haven't run CHECKDB with Data Loss yet


This job is kind of crazy (dun, dun, dun, duh-na-na-nah)
Haven't seen the Sunlight lately (dun, dun, dun, duh-na-na-nah)


Rollin, out version 10.0
With my files sized right so my logs won't grow


Oh yeah, I've got Enterprise Edition
I'm using Resource Governor, with a mission


Putting, all the databases on Standby
For the logs, that I should apply


Installs, I've got down to a science
Service Packs, I know how to apply it


If I learn something yo, I blog it
Check out my site when your browser resolves it (cybersql.blogspot.com)


This job is kind of crazy (dun, dun, dun, duh-na-na-nah)
Haven't seen the Sunlight lately (dun, dun, dun, duh-na-na-nah)




(Word to your Mutha)

Here are a few other submissions I tracked down.


http://benchmarkitconsulting.com/colin-stasiuk/2009/05/01/sqlfool-sql-server-rap-contest/


http://blogs.lessthandot.com/index.php/DataMgmt/DataDesign/sql-rap-i-am-the-dbcc-yeah-u-know-me


http://sqlchicken.blogspot.com/2009/04/sql-rap-by-dj-majik-poultry.html

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